Decisions@!#@!#$

I have a quandry, they seem to find me rather easily or a least I have no problem finding them!
I am not computer savy and to learn what I have- scanning images, resizing images, building a website, figuring out the commands of a blog- has been a painful experience. One day scans are beautiful, one day they are not, one day I push keys and things on the computer work, one day I push the same keys and my computer hates me!
Well in the search for an easier, or maybe just more like my brain works- blog- I tried out Typepads service. And of course, somethings on typepad I love, somethings on Blogger I like better. Somethings on Typepad work easier, somethings on Blogger work easier!
But now after doing an Illustration Friday- have also concluded,becuase most everyone use Blogger- Typepad is a nuance to check out others sites-
Ahhhh! So being my flippy floppy self- am now wondering if I should return to Blogger- have 12 more days on my free trial offer to Typepad-
decisions- @#$#$@%^#@

I have moved!

Over the weekend I moved my blog- so if you're looking for me- go to http://juliakelly.typepad.com/moonflower_musings/
see you there!!

Illustration Friday....80's

Warning: There is a heavy dose of reminiscing- so if you don't know me- I apologize!
This was fun! A blast from the past! Got the email this morning and it prompted me to pull out my portfolio from art school! Started the fall of 1986- 18 and naive- I packed my bags and headed to Fort Lewis College in Durango Colorado- ( funny just reminiscing about Durango in my journal blog this morning!
The pic is of Lauren and Michelle- the stars of the theater program at Loveland High School- I was the behind the scenes Assistant Director and Stage Manager and an aspiring art student- we would go done to Lake Loveland- and I would photograh them and Megan and Tom- ( which I am going to find some of those photos for the world to see!- Megan will "die"- but sa la vie- do you remember that from French class Megan!)
Well the four "cool" ones would be in front of the camera- and me the "geek" would be behind- which I loved- and we would take the most awesome black and whites- me reviling in being "artistic"- my step dad had a dark room in the basement and a "kindness" that let me develop as much as I wanted to- wow- got to find those black and whites!
Well when I head off to art school- I took them and used them alot in my freshmen design class- so here is the blast from the past and a few black and whites to torture my old friends- boy I wish I knew where Michelle was- she headed off to make her fame as an actress- think she is in Washington DC- last I checked- getting rave reviews in a play- if I remember right- might have to "google" her!

Tom and Megan! wow does this not scream the 80's!
One of the boys had an old truck- huh-loved them even back then- old Fords and Chevys- and the Awesome Four!

Ahhhh Durango

Drove over to Durango yesterday- had a whole list of things I can't get done in the "boondocks".
What a treat- to be in a town so beautiful, so "professional". Walking into the printers- they totally knew what they were doing- to walk into wonderful stores with soooo many choices and such helpful people, instead of Walmart with whatever they have and not so helpful people. To chose from about four coffee shops with in walking distance. I was unrushed- browsing the wooden shelves of Maria's bookstore, chatting with others who wanted to recommend the book I had in my hand- strolling Nature Oasis Natural Food Store- buying more then I really needed. Went to City Market and the check-out people were the same- a little bit grey-er then they were when I lived there almost..... twelve years ago- it just hasn't changed, gotten busier maybe- a few stable resturants like Father Murphies and Clancys are no more- Carvers- the bakery has gone "high brow"- different stores downtown- but staples like Gardenswartz and the Needles are still there.
Driving home I pondered why we left- such a wonderful town where we could walk downtown with our dogs and stroll the streets, coffee or tea in our hand, a town where we fit a little bit more then we do here.
Then I remembered about becoming parents and how greatly our motivations changed- I will always love Durango- but sadly it did not offer- for us- the world of close friends and fellowship in a body of believers- as we are blessed with here- and that is why we left.
That and getting tired of pulling flyers off our cars for seminars on Goddess worship, hearing conversations about Jesus Christ channeling a manuscript to an author to write a book and the house next door to us that became a "bongo" factory- nothing against drums but to listen to them 24 hours a day gets old.
So Durango has turned into a very nice place to visit but I wouldnt want to live there again- well maybe when I am an old grey haired artist- adorned with silver and beads- and Jon is a old retired lawyer- just doing a few probonos on the side- we could live there- but now our attention is turned to Utah and Moab- a place as interesting as Durango in so many ways- so I dont know!
I did tell myself I need to get over there way more then I am- cause I really, really needed that yesterday!

imperfection

here are those that hide their imprefections deep within them with their back to the rest of us. I don't know why they do that- I do not think less of them because they are imperfect- but have recently come to the conclusion that they can think less of me-because of mine.

Never Mind the Wind

his Labor Day, I was a freebie attendee at the Telluride Film Festival. I got to spend the weekend rubbing elbows with producers, directors and other want-a-bes.
As a freebie attendee, I had to wait till the pass holders had been seated in the venues and "if" there was room then us "freeloaders" were allowed in.
One movie that I did get into see was Volver, starring Penelope Cruz. Set in Spain and with English subtitles- it is the story of three generation of women, trying to etch out a life, steeped in tradition, economic depression, lazy or no good men, and the wind- that never stops blowing.
The movie opens as the women of the village are at the cemetery-cleaning their family crypts- carrying on the traditions of their mothers and grandmothers. To an outsider- it seems like a hopeless pursuit- the wind faster in bring dust then the women can brush it away. But I understand this tradition- coming to the place of your family, reading the names to your children, laying flowers down for them. I have been doing this with my mother and my grandmother as long as I can remember- and now I do it with my children.
Memorial Day to many is the beginning of the summer- to get the boats out and hit the lake for the first time in the season, to join the long line of cars on the freeways headed to here or there for a much needed relaxing weekend. But to some- a few hours of the weekend is spent in collecting flowers- most seasons lilacs are spent by the end of May- but peonies should be glorious. In a good year- no store bought flowers will be needed, but in a cool spring- carnations might be bought, sometimes in bundles of red white and blue.
Then early Monday morning the grandchildren are lined up with saved small tin cans which have been rolled in foil and anchored with rocks- to build bouquets- under the instructions of their grandmother, mothers and aunts- who careful disperse the glorious flowers and encourage the use of the green leafed branches for fillers. The small cans finished, the buckets of Peonies, baby’s breath, daisies, columbines and bleeding hearts, clippers, canvas, and jars of water set in the back of the car- with a designated grandchild to watch that the buckets of flower do not fall over- we start our rounds, delivering the little bouquets of flowers- to old friends- discussions arise as to the locations of the graves- by that stand of pines? Second or third row from the road? Victory is given to the one who finds the marker first and in turn a little bouquet of flowers is placed carefully by on of the granddaughters with a history lesson of our family given by her grandmother, then it is off to the car, to find the next place to put the foil wrapped tin, already in the hands of the next granddaughter.
When all the tins are delivered- we drive to the newer cemetery- flat with out the moss covered weather worn tombstones rising up from the ground and navigate the narrow lanes, lined with other cars, their trunks up and their families carrying buckets of flowers to their loved ones, and park near the back. Our graves are easy to spot, five in a row, a small American flag marking the spot. Taking the buckets, canvas and water, we get to work, pulling up the vases that have sat underground for a year and been the homes to spiders and ants. They are carefully rinsed off and secured in their stands and then filled with water. The canvas is laid out and we all start placing the flowers- making sure each gets a bursting peony first. Daisy are abundant and given to the granddaughters to stuff where they please. Discussion is on how good or bad the flowers are this year and would Grandma approve. When the vases start to fill up, we ration out the Columbine, each granddaughter placing one in her great grandmother or grandfather, great great aunt or uncles or great uncles vase and we stand back to admire how pretty our vases look.
Why do we do it- because that is what we were taught to do- by our mothers, by our grandmothers- who's mothers taught them- like the ladies of Volver- it doesn’t matter is the wind brings the dust the second we turn our backs- this is tradition.

Geezers and Girlfriends

uesday mornings,my girlfriends meet up at the "Olde Geezer" coffee house. No that is not the name on the door, it is really the backend of a craftstore/bookstore, with a row of cement blocks and boards with a combination of new and used books. Then there is a little bit of bulk coffee, a little bit of tea, a little bit of a lot of things hanging from the walls and on the shelves. But it is out in the "boondocks" near where we all live and most of us have no desire to drive the fifteen minutes to the larger town that has the nice, posh, coffee places- so it is the "Old Geezers" for us.
The Geezers are regular attenders, as rural westerners as you can get, their old pickup trucks lined in a row next to all our SUV with our cargo boxes and bike racks hanging off of them. The geezers take up the bar and the backtables, with their Carhart jackets over the back of their chairs, overall or Wranglers on, and chunky old boots- they "yarn" with Vern, the owner- as they have one ear caucked towards the girls conversations that go the gamit of our families to our faith, reading Vogue or traveling the world,as our cell phones go off-one after another.
We dont usually meet over holidays or breaks and today when we walked in, the Geezers cheered, glad for our return, having missed us over Christmas.
Why does this Tuesday morning mix work so well- because they all are sweet old man and we have seem to become a highlight of their week-

Leaks!

ell I have started off the "guideline" of an blog a day with a bang- check back in a month and see how I am really doing!! Thought about "sailing through" today with getting two up yesterday with my illustration friday entry! But really wanted to record how I came to this ephany!
It was all due to standing around a coffee/bookstore in Farmington New Mexico- waiting for a bagel to be made! Had to travel there for a meeting and found the most wonderful little bookstore- downtown- walls all painted bright colors, filled with wonderful books and earthly people. Next to the coffee counter was a card display and a line of cards of women with long faces, big hands and feet caught my eye- I started reading the captions and realized I understood this artists poetry- I dont know if she would call it poetry- but I did- Susan Mrosek is her name and her line of cards is called "pondering pool" - some of her phrases I dont get "yet"- I hope they will seep into me in time- the ones I do- so hit a cord with me- about the ways we as women carry our joys and our sorrows on us and in us- in such a physical way- that is what I love about her work- here is one to ponder upon-
" Slumber- I must say I am exhuasted!I've tossed twice over and once on my back. I've no room to lounge in this jumble of thoughts that crowd my bed." From her book Leaks
I love her work and it certainly inspires me- but what really hit me like a freight train was reading in her book and here I quote her again-
"It stands to reason.
I stand to reason.
I stand to write.
Writing helps make reason-
which is the reason I write."
Wow! I am an artist I create- I am a writer- so I should be writing- for that "Stands to Reason!"
to check her out- go to the pondering pool link in the side bar!

"Illustration Friday- Buzz"

Poppies will always remind me of my grandma- behind her house on Franklin street. She had a field of poppies, and I can just see her standing in the middle of them as I came around the corner of her house on my bike.
As I do more and more fabric collage I am amazed at how little visually detail we need to identify what we know- the bees are just a small row of stitches- but the yellow/black certianly identifies a "bee"!

A Blog a Day!

ew Year Resolutions have always just been a mark of failure to me, as they are for many people. I seem to do much better sort of sneaking up on my self improvements,slightly adjusting the course till I surprise myself with being in a better place then I was.
On a long drive across Northwest New Mexico, I came up with some course changes- that if I do them more then I don't- I should be pleased with the results.
The first one was to-if at all possible-blog everyday,abandoning my daily paper journal-which I feel somewhat guilty about- for an online journal. Pondering the difference between the two, I came up some guidelines to follow- more times then not.
1. A paper journal is personal- really only for the eyes of the writer. Pope John Paul had his journals burned at the time of his death- always wondered if his assistants took a peek before striking the match. An online journal is universal- literally! Already there has been traffic on this blog from China, Portugal and even Siberia!! Two concerns arise- 1- What you might think of me- if I expose my thoughts and ponderings- "Better keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool- then open it and remove all doubts! (or something like that) and 2nd- the challenge of having the content be- more then it is not- something that will resonate to an universal audience.
I claim to be a writer, as I claim to be an artist- there is not a day I don't put my hands on something to do with my art- there are many days- I do not write- that is what I hope to change- someone once said "you have to write 1,000 pages of &%^&^#$ before you write anything good- well here is to getting 365 pages of %^%$%^&# out of me- and maybe a few good morsels along the way to!
Oh- and being a "universal journal" please feel free to comment- just click the comment button at the bottom of the post- and after a quick register- comment away- as long as my kids would be allowed to read it- I will post it for all to see- Here is to the journey- wherever it may lead!

"Illustration Friday-Peace"

May none of your sheep get away from you this Christmas Season!- giving you the time and the energy to reflect on the true meaning of the season and the only way to true Peace for our world!




"The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only,who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." John 1:4




Merry Christmas!!

"Illustration Friday-Peace"

( for some reason- highly likely me- there is no comment box on this post- so if you do want to comment-click on Moonflower Musing in the link section to get to my current page- which should work! Thanks!!"

May none of your sheep get away from you this Christmas Season!- giving you the time and the energy to reflect on the true meaning of the season and the only way to true Peace for our world!

"The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only,who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." John 1:4

Merry Christmas!!

I'm Sorry!

I'm sorry to do this to some of you- but this is what we woke up to this morning- a true blue, no white, Colorado Christmas! Which as not happened in a number of years- and the forecast is holding to more snow before the big day- so our dreams of a White Christmas seem to be coming true!
Wherever you are- and whether you have snow on the ground or not- My dream for you on Christmas is that you will be near the ones you love and the "world" will slow down enough for you to think upon the reason for the season! That God became man and walked among us!!
Merry Christmas!

"...Tag I'm It!"

Tag, I'm It
I have been "cybertagged!"
Made myself finish a big project first- mailed it off this afternoon, so now I can come out and play! Here goes:

4 jobs I have had: Hum...
First Job-busing tables at a Chinese Restaurant- we got to eat as many broken fortune cookies and egg drop soup as we could for free- can't touch either now!
Worked three summers as a nursing assistant in a nursing home through college- learned a lot about life!
Worked as a counselor with severely disturbed kids for a summer- where I got attacked and bite in the arm by a twelve year old girl- totally my fault- pushed her to much to participate in an activity-had a perfect set of teethmarks on my arm for the whole summer- learned a lot about life!
Now I get to be an illustrator- which is soooo cool- but not as cool as my favorite job- Mom!


4 movies I could watch over and over:
(actually I do watch movies 0ver and over- and behind the scenes over and over- actually listen to them as I work in my studio- my current favorite are- it changes a lot)
Cold Mountain
Last of the Mohicans
Lord of the Rings Trilogy
(to confess)
Mission Impossible, Jason Bourne movies- (action with heart)- hey- I had a older brother who was bigger then me and he got to pick the movies- I got addicted

4 places I have lived (apart from where I am now):
Boulder Colorado
Aspen Colorado
Durango Colorado
Loveland Colorado ( where I moved nine times without changing school- my mother was a real estate agent- we even moved across the street once)
I was in Denver for two years-but it was really "just visiting" while my husband finished law school!

TV shows I love:
( okay- I am a closet Sci Fi nut!)
Farscape- has to be the funniest show out there- in a dark sort of way
Battlestar Galactic- was raised on the old series- like the first two seasons of the new- withholding judgement on the third- I don't know!
Eureka- new series on the Sci Fi channel-
Lost- hey- you can download six episodes on www.abc.com- that is sooooo cool- on demand TV- bring it on!

4 sites I visit daily-
www.yahoomail.com
www.amycullingsmoreno.com
www.gingernielson.com
www.sherry-rogers.com
( actually really don't visit the last three daily, often but not daily- but am chatting with them daily- so really am doing a shameless plug!)

That is pretty much it-
other then
www.movielink.com
where you can download movies for about the price of payperview


4 favorite foods:
Bing Cherries
Bread
Popcorn
Shrimp


4 places I would rather be:
Anywhere with my husband and kids ( and our dogs)
In a bookstore
"People Watching" in a mountain town like Telluride
Making dinner for my friends

4 People I am tagging:
Everyone I know has been tagged!!
I shall remain it tell I make some new cyber friends I can tag!

" Illustration Friday- Might"

They MIGHT be wrapped up in that blanket because they are cold... and they MIGHT not be...
Okay- enough with trying to get the theme this week to work and in the children's section, sorry. I just finished this and really wanted to get it up here for the whole world to see, so I was gonna make it work somehow!
"Harvesting Poles" is actually inspired by many times coming across Native American families, in the National Forest in Southwest Colorado as they chop, actually ..as they chainsaw, down Logpole Pines to be used in their tepees. No- they do not live in them all the time, mostly they live in doublewide trailers, clustered in family groups, out on reservation, But they come up into the mountain to get the poles for tepees they stay in during their spiritual festivals or Pow Wows. And sometimes they will hide the poles in the forest and then they only have to bring the canvas to make shelters when they camp in the mountains.
I have never seen an old truck used, usually the poles are tied to the tops of minivans, but this was more picturesque.
Lodgepoles are very tall and straight evergreens, and have been harvested for dwelling for a very long time, the first white settlers also used them in building
log cabins and barns when they first came to the west.
Blankets are also very important to Native Americans, they are given as gifts to mark important ceremonies and are considered prized possessions and there is meaning in their design and how they are worn.
But a boy and a girl, wrapped up together, needs no explaination, ..... oh- children's section- sorry!

...a safe harbor

When our kids were little and exploring the world they found security having their father right there with them. Out on a hike, they would climb a boulder and call for their dad to be right under them and then they would have the courage to climb a little farther. In the city park, they could find the bravery to ask the person if they could pet their dog- if they had hold of daddy's hand. On the playground, they would venture forth and then unsure run back to hold his pant legs till they were more sure about the merry go round and the other children.
Sometimes in a crowded room,being so small and daddies being so tall, our toddlers would latch on to the wrong set of legs and then realizing the mistake they would scurry over to be whisked up in strong arms and reassured.
Children learn- Daddies keep you safe, or they should, that is what God intended. Many fathers are not there to protect their children and many bring harm to the ones they are intrusted to- that is Not what God intended.
My children were blessed with a father who would lay down his life for them without millasecound hesitation- we all are not as fortunate with our earthly father. But our heavenly father has already layed down his life for us- when he died on the cross, so that we could always be with him, if we only asked.
But the promise does not stop with a heavenly guarnentee. He promise to be with us always- "even to the ends of the earth" that there is no place on this earth, "no height nor depth" that can seperate us from him now. In the scary situations he is there, in the happy times he is there, in the new and exciting times he is there. We only need to look behind us and run back into his safe harbor, the trick is remembering to do it.

...The Princess is Here!! And the Parrots are Flying!!

My dear friend Ginger Nielson (also a wonderful illustrator) has a new book out! Coming soon to a bookstore near you or on Amazon.com!
check out her website at www.gingernielson.com


And Sherry Rogers, another talented illustrator and dear friend has her new book out as well- at bookstores and online!
check out her website at
www.sherry-rogers.com


I am soooooooo lucky to rub elbows and be encourage by these ladies!!!!

Illustration Friday "Ghost?"

This week's theme for "Illustration Friday" was Ghost. Here is a little history on Halloween F.Y. I.-
Halloween- Originated as a Celtic Harvest Fest-It is the evening before "All Saints Day" - a Christian religious holiday. As was typical, the church holidays were set at the same time as pagan holidays with hopes the people would abandon their rituals. Instead- a melding of the two happened and today we have both religious and pagan roots in holiday traditions. A night where the spiritual world and the physical world are intertwined.
Black Cats- originally seen as "good luck" when a black cat cross your path , the Church associated them with Witches and through that association, the stigma changed to "bad luck"
Jack-o-lanterns- Comes from an Irish Folktale where after losing a deal with the devil- A not so clever farmer ends up becoming "Jack of the Lantern" and wanders the earth with a candle lit inside of a turnip."

Most of our Halloween tradition came with the immigrants from Ireland in the 1800's. And much of it was melted together in America and then adopted out to other countries- such as Canada, UK and Australia as a 20th century "pop culture" tradition!
(from Wikipedia.com)

...Here's to Muddling Through!"

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6&7 NIV

Recently I have been
thinking about these verses, so often we think of results and pray fervently for them. Lord heal, Lord save, Lord spare me. Lord take care of this or of that. And if He does, we we think He is watching out for us and if He doesn't we think He doesn't care for us. But answering our prayers, the way we think they should be answered is not the promise. The promise is that no matter what is happening, no matter how much we are in "the depth of despair" to borrow a quote from Anne Shirley, He will guard our hearts, since the Evil One is always looking for an opening. In other words, when life, or people, or our own stupidity wounds us, leaves us open for attack He will be there to make sure that we are protected. Nothing, no event, no circumstance should cause us to doubt His love and His protection.
Now I am not saying, we should be dancing in the streets when bad things happen. Some circumstance call for "muddling through". Getting through one day at a time, only think about one day at a time, is sometimes all we can do.
I am in such a time. There will be no quick solutions to the difficult waters I am navigating right now. We are dealing with ailing parents, that need help, a lot of help that takes a lot of time. My husband and I still have small children, careers and commitments, so shifting our lives, which are full, so there is room for this new responsibility is taking its toll.
And as usually in stressful times, are we getting to church every Sunday, doing a daily devotional, praying frevently? No- my prayers as of late, are a few words- " Lord, help" or filled with petty frustrations on my part and complaints- but He will listen and then am amazing thing happens, a feeling of ....the universal word would be peace- but it is more a feeling of " it will be alright, it will be okay, you will survive this cause I am right here with you." washes over me. He guards my heart. It is a promise He will never break.

..."The City Different"

Went to Santa Fe this weekend with some girlfriends. What an amazing city,known as "The City Different", which one of my girlfriends wanted me to explain to her why.I couldn't, but after we walked the streets for the weekend, she didn't need anyone to.
In the center of Santa Fe is the town plaza. On one side of it is the Palace of the Governors, where from 1600's the Spanish and the Native People have been playing a serious game of "King of the Hill", battling and retaking the compound, each in possession of it for a few decades.Why did they each want it so bad, for the Native People it was to maintain their way of life and existence, the Spainish, to benifit from the riches of the North they had to hold Santa Fe as a hub for their trade routes up from Mexico.
Trade is still here at the plaza, now the Native Americans fill the long porch of the Palace, sitting near blanket filled with silver and inlaid stone jewelry, as the crowds slowly pass by, crouching down to buy their wears.
The streets jut out from the plaza, with narrow sidewalks next to adobe walls that guard the hacindas behind them. But now, through the gates of the hacindas, lining their flower laidened courtyards are shops and galleries and days can be spent wandering the maze and getting lost, if only for awile, in the "City Different"